33: vulnerability is a $30k/month skill
how practicing vulnerability helped me make $30k/month in college:
the summer before my senior year of undergrad i took a job selling pest control door to door. within the first month it was clear to me that i had the potential to become a top salesman, but after an initial period of improvement i hit a total wall. i just couldn’t seem to get to the next level.
my skills were improving every day. i was putting a ton of effort into mastering the pitch, nailing my tonalities, discovery, rapport, closing technique...
but i was stuck. it seemed like the harder i tried to sell, the more frustrated i got, and somehow my customers could sense it. my sales hit a hard plateau, and no amount of working harder or more seemed to fix it.
until i remembered a course i took earlier than year on building stronger connection. one of the core tenets they taught was the attitude of vulnerability.
vulnerability seemed like the least useful thing i could bring to the doors. i typically had between 5 seconds and 5 minutes to persuade a homeowner to listen to me, and the first thing you learn as a d2d salesman is to never waste time and Get To The Damn Point.
but i listened to a podcast by Joe Hudson about the same topic, and something clicked for me: vulnerability isn’t just about trauma dumping and sharing your emotional highs and lows. sometimes it’s just saying the scary but honest thing that you want to hide.
for me, it was simple: i want to sell you pest control. i want you to become my customer. i want your credit card and your signature on this contract.
(ok maybe i didn't say the last part)
up to this point, i had been subtly dancing around the outcome i wanted with my prospects. even though i was obviously a door-knocking salesperson, i often deflected statements like “you’re just trying to sell me something”, and like a guy creeping on his "girl best friend", i was trying to close deals without consciously and outrightly admitting (to myself and the other person) that Yes, I Do Want To Sell You Something.
idk why this was such a revelation to me. but once i started to apply this principle, it worked like a charm. when i’d get to a stall point with a potential customer, instead of finding some other clever angle to pitch them with, i’d just address the elephant in the room:
“hey, so obviously i’d love to earn your business. that's what i'm here for and what i'm paid to do. but at the end of the day, i only want that if i can actually help you. what do you think could make this a win-win if we worked together?”
it seems like such a small, stupid thing. but i could immediately notice people’s faces relax, their shoulders drop, and the trust in the conversation went from “homeless person asking me for money” to “still slightly awkward but quite enjoyable second date” in an instant.
not sure why i haven't talked about this or written about it in more detail before bc it was genuinely transformative (along with several dozen other things i learned in my d2d days about psychology, mindset, and performance - but thats for another day). but if anyone finds this stuff interesting im happy to speak more on it